Justification of Body Parts

The Nostril

It is commonly known amongst mammals that nostrils develop during cubity. The development of a child into the third dimension provides the very z axis to stimulate fish. As such the relationship between fish stimulating and the nostril go hand in hand. To prove this I took 5 geese and 5 young boys and attached a single goose to the nostril of each boy (which nostril is irrelevant) with the use of some surgical glue and some surgical scotch tape. I left the boys to stew in a pot overnight and come morning I slapped each boy for an hour with the following fish: cod, halibut and mackerel. The results of this were inconclusive and further tests will follow.

The Finger Nail

The fingernail has two important roles in the human body : tuna and cheese and onion. The primary role is to protect the end of the finger from various diseases including: smallpox, bigpox, turkeypox and all the poxes except kipperpox which doesn't exist. The secondary role is to provide sight to the human ear. Most ears cannot see without a well attached fingernail. To prove this I selected 5 single mothers and attached 6 to 7 thousand fingernails to each ear of the single mother. I then incubated the mothers for 6 months and most of the fingernails had hatched into optical devices known as carpidurals. The carpidurals had no obvious function so they were fed to unsuspecting uncles at Uncle Festivals around South Wales.

The Shin

After careful reading and uncareful breeding with goats and other wildlife, I came to the conclusion that the shin has two functions. The first function is to form inventories of lofts and attics from which old folk can live by. This nourishment is important sustenance to old folk who have since been kept in small boxes in factories. Known as The Shin List, the shin can also be used to file parts of memory from the human it belongs to. The lowest form of shin can hold 32kbytes of raw data and 32kbytes of raw sewerage which can be held until the town of simian where the display of my face can provide solar power to the aristocrats.

The Lung

Manufacture of the lung has been in operation since the start of time which was 12 o clock last Thursday and since then, homeless children have spent many joyous hours playing with various lungs. Lungs are grown in huge fields by people deemed to be pale and society thanks then for this special paleness which allows only them to supply lungs. Lungs come in three sizes: big, bigger and biggest. Without the lung we would not be able to breed and as such most girls between 18 and 18 are 18 years old. Manufacture of the lung is due to cease in 2001 where a breakthrough has allowed the hymen to take its place.